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The Desire to Matter

I’m young yet through my relatively short life I have encountered numerous people who are concerned that the individual story they are constructing has seemingly zero purpose when they look at the overarching narrative of society. On the surface that may be true, but I think to perceive the world in that light is incredibly misleading and not helpful whatsoever.

Variety yields the potential for things to be interesting and continuous. This blog post will never generate the same amount of attention as something Rob Bell were to write, yet I am reaching an audience who may never hear of or care about Rob Bell. Realistically, what I’m doing serves no purees in the GRAND scheme of things, but why do I have to be involved in the grand scheme rather than constructing and building my own scheme? The grand scheme is selfish, whereas building your own scheme of importance based on your surroundings and where your influence can spill into is beautiful and necessary. 

That sounds relatively self righteous, and that’s not my intention. All I mean to say is that humanity is going to continue to get bigger. We are always growing. Because of that, creating or doing something that will have a lasting impact is incredibly difficult.  Not impossible, but difficult. Therefore, if we are to truly pass the torch as we become older, we must analyze and determine where are influence is and how we can best springboard that influence to create change within the subculture we find ourselves in. 

After all, is that not how the greatest thinkers developed their influence? Look at the influential thinkers of the past. All of them were working within their direct area of influence which then in turn led to widespread fame. Aristotle, Jesus, Gandhi, Confucius. I don’t think any one of these individuals told themselves every morning when they woke up that what they were doing was going to effect every person on earth. They worked within the framework they had, what they said caught on, and now, in some cases thousands of years later, we’re still talking to them.  

Wisdom and influence are exponential things. They first gain headway within specific location or areas of thought and expand as they get passed along over time. Having the mindset of doing something that will impact the grand scheme of things is a very ill informed and needless goal. Develop a scope of influence, embrace it, and work with it. Who knows, maybe it’ll catch on so much in that setting that it will go on to alter worldwide perception. But never have that be the starting goal. All that yields is dissatisfaction with the self which is crippling to creativity and potential. And to truly progress as an individual, we need as much of those two things as we can get.

Dealing With Our Darkness

Darkness yields light, light yields darkness. As cliche and old as that expression is, the truth of it holds validity every single day with the rising and setting of the sun. For a lot of people, life is about finding as much light as possible. Historically that is the track that we’ve taken. The invention of electricity was a direct result of us longing to be in the light more than the dark. In light we can see, in light things are clear, and in light we can be aware as to where we are and what exactly is going on.

 This is true psychologically as much as it is physically. We are surrounded by a culture here in the west that encourages self empowerment. With add slogans like “have it your way” and “put a smile on” we are engrained in a thought process that encourages us to embrace happiness and repress sadness. We laugh off uncomfortable things. The comedians job is to unveil ones unconscious repressions just long enough that they can laugh them off. One laughs out of the uncomfortable truth the comedians truth exposes. When one leaves a comedy show, they may go out to a club with friends, drink to a point of inebriation, and dance to music with a message of inauthentic happiness only to distract themselves from the terrifying unmasking of who they really are that the comedian just exposed only a few hours previously. 

We don’t like darkness. We like to hide our ghosts deep within us. But the problem with that is, as Peter Rollins points out so well, is that when we hide our ghosts, they show up at the must unfortunate of times. Creeping up on us to haunt us in our darkest days. 

In The Gospel of Thomas which is a part of the Apocrypha (books that weren’t deemed worthy to be in Protestant Bibles but are still in some Catholic ones) there is a quote that reads as follows, “If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what is within you will destroy you.” I find this absolutely fascinating. 

The things that haunt us must be unmasked. They must be brought to light in order for us to be able to unveil them. This is why a church can be so toxic if all it talks about is right belief without also promoting attendees to wrestling with and embrace the reality of doubt and questioning. Sunday services have largely become nothing more than a medication we take once a week to help us repress the difficulties we face Monday through Saturday.

If we don’t deal with the harsh realities and try and cover them up with bandaids, those bandaids are bound to fall off. Drinking to get drunk is a bandaid. Constant clubbing and dancing to pop music about self entitlement is a bandaid. Purchasing products to make you feel accomplished or somehow important is bandaid. A sermon about how you're loved by God and will someday be with “Him” somewhere else is a bandaid. We are a bandaid culture.

Yet everyone knows that even the rawest of wounds need exposure to heal properly. Our wounds need to be brought to light. They must be unasked in order for them not to scar. 

There are many ways to go about this. Honest conversation over a few beers leads to a looseness but functioning consciousness that leads to openness where individuals can honestly express what’s wrong in their life. In this sense alcohol is a gift, but we have unfortunately turned it into just another tool to repress our worries and struggles. Other ways to cope with the dark sides of life are movies with sad endings, and my personal favorite, sad songs.

I can almost guarantee your response to some of these suggestions was, “wow, that’s incredibly depressing” or, if you’re my parents, “why is Mikey talking about drinking a few beers…” 

However, the reality of the situation is it is not “depressing” but inherently necessary. We are taught to constantly live in light and never deal with darkness, I touched on that in the beginning of this post. That leads to any idea of darkness as being depressing in the mind of most. But I want to argue that is incredibly unhealthy. For if you don’t reveal what is wrong, what is within you will destroy you, as Thomas so eloquently states.

In a post to come in about two weeks I’m going to do my first album review on the upcoming Death Cab for Cutie release “Kintsugi.” I’d strongly recommend you check out some of the singles they’ve released so far to get a feel for what I think may be one of the bands best music to date. The album title, Kintsugi, derives from an ancient Japanese art where one takes broken pieces of pottery and molds the cracks back together with a gold or silver paste. This form of art doesn’t try and hide the broken pieces tied to it, but portray them as part of the beauty and past of the piece… amazing. More to come on that in the coming weeks. But for now, start trying to unmask your worries, struggles, burdens, ghosts, and sadness. For the transformation of our struggles leads to new and invigorating inspiration. Also, you’ll find below links to the Death Cab singles as well as a picture of a piece of pottery that has had the art of kintsugi done on it. 

Death Cab Singles thus far:

Black Sun https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WkNTU0DWfXI

No Room in Frame https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxTH8GZ4PC4

The Ghosts of Beverly Drive https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_ccoMjPNG4

Little Wanderer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=io9ivuo4r6Q 

Microscopes, Stained Glass, and the Sun

At the Rob Bell event I went to this past week, we talked about how everything connects to everything else. Within the fundamental make up of the universe there is this thread that ties everything together. Something unites things that aren’t similar and that unification is the recognition that within everything, there is always something more going on. We are to be actively renewing our minds to see the incredible work unfolding around us. I thought I’d give that a try in this blog post.

I’m going to talk about microscopes, stained glass, and the sun.

As every kid who ever had a middle school biology class is aware, microscopes allow us to see things that we would otherwise not see. A microscope is a tool we use in order to analyze and collect data for small things that we are progressively finding more and more about. Bacteria, germs, atomic structures, you name it. Whatever is small, a microscope magnifies. A microscope allows us to dive deeper, see what we would otherwise not without it, and advances us forward in our understanding of the world. 

Stained glass is an art that a lot of people associate with old church buildings. It’s tied to history. Unlike the microscope, it would seem that stained glass is pulling us back to a previous time. A time where we would rather not go. A time that seems stuck in tradition and not relevant enough for where we are as a society now. But have you ever looked at stain glass as the sun radiated through it? Have you ever seen the colors that make up a stain glass window become illuminated in such a way that they seem to be showing shades that you’ve never even seen before? Stained glass is beautiful. Antiquity is beautiful. Things aren’t bad because they are a part of our past. In fact, our past is what got us here. We need the past. We need to be reminded of the beauty it can hold. And when we look to the past, often times we can see things that we would otherwise never be able to see.

The sun is this big booming bright orb that is super hot. It burns our skin. Melts our ice. Calls us outside. And illuminates the beauty that it sustains in nature. The sun is constant. It is a thing that as long as life itself has been around, it will be. And as long as life stays around, it will be. The sun is both behind and ahead of us. The sun sustains. The sun is to life on earth what coffee is to a Seattleite. The sun is a must. 

The question then becomes, what exactly does this all mean? What is the point of these three independent variables being grouped together? Well, it’s quite simple really. A healthy perspective on God relies on the microscope and the stained glass, and an understanding of what the sun stands for.

Microscopes push us forward. Without them, we’d be living in a time with terrible disease and far less potential than we have now. If we don’t integrate the microscope of God into our definition of God we begin to limit what exactly God is up to. Science is a good thing. Expanding consciousness is a good thing. New perspectives are a good thing. They keep our pulse going. They sustain us. 

However, too much microscope can limit people form the full potential of God and can also make people a bit too high and mighty. Stained glass is important because it’s a reminder that something of the past can still evoke positive emotion and an appreciation while simultaneously reminding us that the past isn’t all dark and gross, but actually quite beautiful. Stained glass humbles our advanced minds. It keeps us in check. It calls for a balance.

However, without the sun, neither one of these two realities is possible because the sun is the sustaining beat. The driving force. When we realize that everything is under the sun, everything has life because the sun, and that all can be illuminate in new light as a direct result of the sun, we begin to see just how important the sun is. The sun is God. Not literally I don’t think, but more metaphorically. The sun is the beginning and the end. The thing that illuminated the first truth and what will illuminate the last truth and the light what shined equally to every truth expressed in between. The sun will always be here. Whether it’s shining through stained glass or providing the light to see what’s being studied beneath the microscope. The sun is outside of everything yet simultaneously the driving force behind everything.

So embrace the microscope. Embrace the stained glass. And begin to see how whether past or future, all in some way are an illumination of the sun.

Bell, Rohr, and Something I Learned in Laguna Beach

Have you ever tasted a food so great that when you try and explain the taste you can’t help but realize that you’ll never be able to properly express the experience? Or, have you ever listened to a song and you try humming it for someone or even showing it to them but you know that your explanation can’t do it justice because it spoke something so necessary to you at that moment that any words you use will fall short? Or maybe you went on a hike and the sun hit the trees in such a way that you couldn’t help but stop and stare. You tried to take a picture but you know any photo you take will undoubtedly fall short of the experience? 

Yeah, I’m in the midst of one of these experiences. And I’m going to try and put it into words. Not to try and make you feel like you were a part of the reality necessarily, but to hopefully provide an example that hints at one of the lessons that was powerful to me.

I’m currently in between two Rob Bell events in Laguna Beach, California. The first one ended tonight and started yesterday evening. Rob Bell and Richard Rohr conducted the conversation together. One would speak, the other would be speak, and then the two minds would come together to converse about what each had to see. Rohr spoke with his grandfatherly wisdom, talking about concepts spanning from the cosmic Christ, to a Paul being Christianity's first mystic. Bell did what he is so great at doing. Talking about the absolutely mind blowing scientific theories that point to us being apart of something extraordinary. Both of them combining to create a message of hope not dependent on idyllic projection, but based on an empowerment to see God in the midst of the ever beckoning spiritual reality unfolding all around us.

Now, although this post could play as a simple summary of all the profound things I heard the past 36 hours, that would be nothing more than an explanation of a song you hadn’t experienced yourself. So, instead, I’ll put the ideas into my own words through personal story. And although that may seem too personal to make sense, I believe the lesson is quite clear and universal.

Bell emphasized how expansion is an essential part of the reality of life, and an essential part of the whole of existence. From the Big Bang to changing where we live when we go off to school, healthy realities are all about expansion. What expansion requires, on the personal level at least, is for us to step outside the realm of being comfortable and secure. In order for benefit to be presented in our lives, we must change the norm. Expansion requires boldness. 

The summer of my senior year of High School, I shifted my youth group mentality to one revolving around girls, drinking, and occasional other illicit activities. My mom took notice to this and on one of our reoccurring trips to the bookstore asked me to pick out a book for us to read and discuss over lunch. I picked a book I knew was somewhat controversial within Christianity and accepted my moms offer. That book ended up completely revitalized my faith and allowed me to see God in a whole different way. I accepted the new challenge to hold onto this somewhat controversial version of faith. 

At the end of that summer, I moved 2,000 miles away from everything I had ever known and loved. I headed across the country to pursue schooling at a Bible College I knew full well would be at best be hesitant to my newly discovered progressive faith. A few weeks in, my assumptions proved to be true. After sitting through incredibly uncomfortable lectures, it became quite clear the institution I went to’s idea of God and my idea of God were drastically different. We were at “different stages of consciousness" as both Rohr and Bell would say. 

My freshman year was full of argument, resentment, occasional deep loneliness, and the weekly 10 mile walks in the Spring to get away. All the friendships I had were slightly tainted due to the frustration I had toward the people at the school and how they weren’t at the place I was as far as how they viewed God. I developed an ego. I thought I was better and with that came a slight arrogance and an unhealthy perception of myself

At this point you’re probably thinking “Alright Mike, great sob story. But what’s the point?” Great question!

To flash back… I moved away. It required expansion. I read a book that opened me up to new perspectives before I moved. It yielded expansion. I went to a school where people were at different levels of understanding. So what did I do? I tried to force expansion. 

When expansion is unfolding, it is beneficial. When it is forced, it becomes unwanted dogma that leads to argument and tainted relationship.

The initial expansion of moving out west and the reading of that book the summer before I moved eventually led to the reality of sitting on a balcony in Laguna Beach writing this post right now. And you know what I realize now because of it? All of the expansion in my life thus far has been incredibly beneficial to me, but has had a very limited impact on the lives of those who I encounter. 

The most recent expansion of my conciseness that is a direct result of what was revealed to me at this event has taught that although the expansion I’ve encountered is good and life giving, I should never try to force expansion in others. Force being the key word there.

Everyone is evolving. We are all headed somewhere. But just as every story within the binds of a book goes at its own pace, so to does the life of everyone on this journey we call existence. And that’s beautiful. That’s powerful. This week I’ve been able to eat bacon cheeseburgers covered in guacamole alongside people who have had the same evolution of understanding that I have. It’s been amazing. But if every persons life was at the same place of conciseness and that’s all we ever encountered, how incredibly stale would that get?

Laguna Beach is an art town. The wonderful thing about art is not only is every piece different, but so is every genre. Within all the different genres we find different beauty. The same is true of the human psyche. The sooner we realize that pushing our own agenda actually limits the potential the artist of the art can have, the sooner we recognize how much beauty there is in the art all around us. 

We are all on a journey. Searching, discovering, despairing, hoping. It’s a never ending mystery. There are many mysteries in Laguna Beach. It is, after all, where the show Scooby Doo is set. But the one mystery I solved on this trip is the reality that each person is in the process of uncovering their own story. That process is not one for me to interfere with. But is a process that I can occasionally leave a clue in to help them along their way with the hope that someone ahead of myself in understanding will leave clues for me to find as well.

The Way, the Truth, and the Life

“I am the way, the truth, and the light, no one comes to the Father but through me.” These are rather blunt words that people who have come in contact with Christianity may have at some point heard. Unfortunately, these words spoken by Jesus have been twisted to represent something that I don’t think they were meant to. 

The Evangelical Christian way of interpreting this verse has been with the mindset of Jesus being the only way in which we can come to the “Father.” In other words, Jesus is our keycard into eternity with some God somewhere else. Not only is this a rather domineering perspective on Christ, it also closes people off from the encounter with beauty other perspectives can offer. Furthermore, I believe this is a complete misreading of the passage and in this post I aim to relay what I think Christ really meant when he said this.

In the verse before this one, Jesus' disciple Thomas asks Jesus the driving question. How can we know they way to God? This is a question a lot of us have at some point. We want to have a path to follow, a blueprint that outlines our best course of action. To side track a bit, Thomas’ question just goes to show how incredibly human the Bible is. It’s a book about humans who have a lot of the same questions we all do. Jesus offers an answer to Thomas’s question about life by pointing to himself.

“Thomas,” Jesus says “I am the the way. I am the truth. I’m the life. The life that represents all those things. All the things that the father is defined by, I represent. Because of this I am your way to the father. When you understand the ways in which I act and what I represent, then you can see the ways and characteristics of the father. Then your cataracts will be peeled away.” 

Jesus could care less if Thomas were to accept him, he wants Thomas and all of us to know him. To know his ways, to know the life he represented, to be in tune with his truth. To accept is meaningless, it offers no real life change. But to know… to know is to encounter, and to be involved with something on an intimate and personal level.

This is all good and wonderful, but I think for truths to hold significance, they have to be attached to objective and applicable realities. With that being said, lets talk about gardens.

Gardens are a wonderful representation of diverse beauty. Yet through all their diversity, there is one thing that remains constant in every garden in order for life to be sustainable. Soil. Without soil, a tulip cannot bloom, cherry trees cannot blossom. Soil is the foundation of all the beauty around us. 

I like to view John 14:6, the passage above, with gardens in mind. Just as the soil in a garden is the foundation of the beauty, so Jesus represents the foundation of truth and life. When we recognize this about Jesus, we see God in all things that are tied to those ways and that truth. When we recognize the soil, we recognize what is tied to it by looking at the flowers a garden holds. 

Jesus is the foundation of beauty, however he need not be the only beauty. The ways of Jesus are the ways of God. The soil is in many ways the pulse of the garden. However, what makes a garden beautiful is the diversity that the pulse creates. The fruits of God are everywhere, and they can on the surface appear vastly different. A garden has many different colors and many different scents, but it’s all tied to the same soil, even if at times we aren’t consciously aware of the soils role. To focus strictly on the soil limits the recognition of what the  soil is actually doing. To put strict focus on only Jesus limits the potential of what God is doing through Jesus' characteristics all around us. 

The ways, truth, and life Jesus represents are the same that the insistent God represents. As Jesus says later in the passage, he and God are one in the same. Jesus is the image or physical manifestation of the characteristics that define what an invisible insistence is doing. Wherever the traits of Christ are found is a place that God is actively engaged in, even if Jesus isn’t consciously tied to that reality. 

If all this is true, that means we can encounter God all around us. Things that are tied to love, a recognition of something more going on, and justness are all things tied to the garden of God do to them sharing the characteristics of Christ. So where in your life is this garden bursting forth and how can you be open to encountering that even more? 

A Noah Gundersen song that I’ll attach a link to at the bottom comes to mind when thinking of about this. The chorus states, “But wait, oh wait. See how the morning breaks, it’s the simplest of love songs but it’s all our hearts can take. Though we may lose our stake, heaven is where we make it. Even in the smallest of places, can a garden grow.” 

The beauty of the garden of God is all around us, we just need to open ourselves up to that possibility. To know the ways, truth, and life of Jesus gives us a blueprint into knowing the ways truth and life of an insistent God. This in turn opens us up to the potential of everything all around us.

To close, I want to offer a parable for any of you who are like me and grew incredibly exhausted of the language of Jesus being a man tied to deity and being a life giving being…

There once was a man who refused to associate himself with soil in his garden. He hired a hand, a young man not knowing much about gardening, to till the soil for him and plant flowers. The boy did as he was told day after day in the hot sun of summer. But one afternoon, the boy decided to ask the man why he despised soil so much. The man replied that when he was young, his father was obsessive about his garden and had made him plant all the flowers. Throughout his youth, he began to associate soil with long hot days where he couldn't do anything he desired to do because he was forced to work in the garden. He loved the garden, and found it beautiful, but the heat of the day combined with the messiness of dirt made him hate soil. The boy said to the man, "Yes, I see how that could be troubling. But when you see the soil for what it really is, rather than associating it with what is was forced to be to you, you see a whole new potential." The man asked the boy what he meant. "Well, you see, the soil is the pulse of the garden. It's what allows all the characteristics that you love about it come into being. With it flowers can become beautiful, and smell sweet. Without the soil, life in the garden wouldn't thrive, but with it, it can be fruitful and diverse." At this the old man realized the connection and larger system the soil was tied to, and was able to see the soil in a whole new light that was tied to the life of the whole garden rather than something that was a forced tie to his youth. 

Jesus can be something that is forced on us when we are young. When that happens, he lacks potential in our mind. We grow sick of him. But Jesus is not some guy trying to merely grant us access to life somewhere else when we die. He’s someone calling us to recognize the life all around us here and now. He’s producing gardens with a vast array of flowers. Flowers that may be tied to other worldview’s. Flowers tied to scientific advancement. Flowers tied to things that some may say are”secular.” He is the foundation to all the beauty and goodness, for he gives us a blueprint to what beauty and goodness look like. 

Noah Gundersen- Garden

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3SHHhnU9W-w

A Fresh Perspective on God

When thinking about God, a lot of things come to people’s mind. From the dawn of time, people have come up with theories to try explain the “otherness” that is tied to reality. This has formed religions and, naturally, has formed the rebellion or disbelief in the God associated with those religions evident through atheism. To try and stake a claim in this discussion is touchy, and quite frankly like dumping a cup of water into the ocean. But, I’ll do so anyway.

I’ve been raised a Christian, so naturally my worldview has adjusted to present itself within that framework. Although Christianity has an unGodly (ha ha…) amount of baggage tied to it, I do believe something about it is incredibly interesting, and that is the way God is perceived within it. 

For those of you that aren’t familiar with Christian theology, God is understood as a “Three in One” being. There’s Son (Jesus), Holy Spirit (usually identified through an image of a dove), and the “father” or “other” figure. Christianity believes these are three separate things that are all collectively one within the understanding of God. Right… confusing. But this post is my attempt at relaying how I perceive this and to hopefully offer a new perspective that can subvert ones perception of Christianity in order for you to see how it can be life giving and beautiful. So, here it goes…

There are three words that are incredibly important to remember through this post… Existence, insistence, and persistence. I believe each one of these adjectives can describe one facet of the trinity, and, when perceived collectively, represent the character of God. My opinion of God, that is.

First, let me define these adjectives. Existence, as I understand it, is something that can objectively be proved to be real. For example, I know music exists not just from the record that it is on but also by the sound that that record makes. I know a record exists not just because I see it, but because I can feel it. 

Insistence on the other hand simply requires one of our five senses to lead us to a place of understanding informing us that something more is going on. Or, stated differently, to some sort of transcendent experience. The sound of the music can insist me to recognize some sort of beauty or truth in a song through its melody or lyrics. In this sense, insistence is reliant upon existence, but insistence doesn’t necessarily exist itself, it is the recognition of higher order or meaning amidst all things. 

Persistence is the push to try and get us to share the insistence of the objectively existent thing with those around us. There’s a persistent push inside of me when I hear a beautiful song telling me to share it with others so they can encounter the beauty as well.

Existence

Insistence

Persistence

When understanding God through the understanding of Christianity, we must see Jesus as the existent character. He was alive, had a pulse, and is our springboard to understanding the characteristics of God as… 

Insistence. Jesus urged us to transform and renew our minds to see the heavenly realms before us. The insistence that we feel then when something beautiful happens is from an insistent God. This God is not orchestrating things somewhere else, but insisting through all things beautiful and life giving here on earth right before our eyes. 

The Holy Spirit then, when viewed through the lens that the book of Acts gives us, is a persistent beckoning within us to share the good message of the insistence we’ve felt. This is accomplished through multiple means and can take many forms. Spanning from acts as simple as sharing the insistent reality to standing up to wrongdoing. 

To review:

Jesus is the existent basis that provides the blueprint of what the insistent God is trying to get us to recognize and the Holy spirit is the persistent push in us to get others to recognize this insistence.

Simple enough, right?

This, at least to me, portrays what exactly the “Three in One” idea of Christianity means. The only part of God that is not “active” then, ironically, would be the existent part of God found through 

Jesus. 

Some people may have just raised some red flags to that comment. But I mean active in the sense that it is something we are constantly encountering when we recognize this reality. The interesting thing though is Jesus tells us that we will go on to do far greater things than him… So, perhaps it is on us to be the existent reality of God in our world today. If we do this, we in turn help people recognize, see, taste, and encounter this insistence. Which would then lead for more people to tap into the persistent push of the Holy Spirit urging us to stand up to injustice, help those who are sick, give to the poor, care for the environment, and other things. Which, in turn, would craft a very real Heaven on Earth here and now. A place of peace, prosperity, and overflowing love due to the recognition of the beauty all around, and the desire to bring hope to struggling situations. 

For more on the Insitence of God, check out these works below:

The Divine Magician by Peter Rollins

http://www.amazon.com/The-Divine-Magician-Disappearance-Discovery/dp/1451609043

The Insistence of God by John Caputo

http://www.amazon.com/Insistence-God-Theology-Philosophy-Religion/dp/0253010071/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1424388502&sr=1-2&keywords=john+caputo

For a song touching on the insistence of God (unconsciously at least) check out this song by The Decemberists 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cm6xtkX_Dvs